Bulletin Board Post

Family

I Don't Talk To My Brother

<div class="ExternalClass1C2DDFD0802A4C15839F4D86525DDB1F">I don't talk to my brother anymore and he doesn't talk to me. Unless during family gatherings when we pretend as if everything's fine in front of our relatives. Most of the time we act as if the other just doesn't exist anymore. I've never been okay with that but I'm afraid of him and I'm afraid that if we ever start talking again, we'll only end up fighting. My brother is 18, a year older than me. We used to be pretty close as kids but we drifted apart as we grew up. He became verbally and physically abusive to me to the point that when he would just walk towards me and I would flinch and cry. I never told anyone. So at present, everyone pretty much thinks I'm overacting when they notice I never really liked hanging out or even talking to him. I still love him though. Although I'm sure he wouldn't be so physically abusive to me now that we're old enough to know what's right and wrong, I'm still afraid of him. I think that's one thing "love" can never cure. I want us to be okay. Sometimes I'd look at him and see a glimmer of hope that maybe someday we can fix what was broken. But I don't know, maybe I can only hope. </div>

<div class="ExternalClassBDB7BE702A9C4FDCBB95483972663CC5">Having hope is key to moving forward. Hoping that things will be okay and that your relationship with your brother will get better means that you haven't given up on this. That is awesome! At this time would talking with him, one on one, be an option? Or how about writing him a letter to let him know that you want to better than you are right now. Sometimes putting yourself and your feelings on the matter out there can be liberating for you and for the other person. It sounds like there is always an elephant in the room and nobody wants to talk about it or acknowledge it. You and your brother have grown up and matured and can make this work. It's just going to take time and work on both sides to build a better relationship. We are here for you anytime. If you ever feel like you are not safe or like he is reverting back to his old ways of being physical, don't hesitate to call for help or reach out for more support. Let us know what you think and how things are going. Take care, Naina, counselor</div>

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