Horrible Urge To CutAddictionHorrible Urge To Cut<div class="ExternalClassDECE71B283A349EFA15C0D75B6E6FD29"><p>​<span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">I've felt terrible for so long know. I've made myself hate everyone. I can't trust my 'friends ' anymore. I can't help but feel they hate me and never want me around. I'm afraid no one actually loves me. I don't know anymore. I don't want to see or hear from anyone. Talking to them gives me horrible paranoia and I usually start crying. I don't know how I got here. They aren't bad people but I'm here because I have no one to talk to. I hate that. I feel so helpless. I'm so sorry if I sound like I'm whining for nothing but almost every night I have this horrible urge to cut again. I keep a razor under my mattress just in case I need to. I've been trying so hard not to though. My step dad said he would send me to a nut house if he saw anymore cuts and that really hurt. I don't understand why my parents say things like that. I've talked to a psychologist once when I attempted suicide a year ago. She told my mom where I could go to get help and my mom never took me. It's not like we don't have any money for it. They just really don't care. Right? I don't know I'm sorry. I'm probably wasting your time. I need help. I've stopped thinking that I matter a long time ago and it's getting worse. I've thought of getting into coke, LSD, or acid. I just need something. I'm sorry I probably sound dumb but I don't know what else to say. Thank you so much.​ </span></p></div><div class="ExternalClass4864FB8077F24C26A47C687318ED60F7"><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">Thank you so much for reaching out to talk about how you're feeling.  It definitely sounds like you are overwhelmed with feelings of depression, loneliness, isolation, and self-doubt.  These are some very painful feelings to have, and feeling alone and unsupported can make these kinds of feelings seem much too heavy to carry.  We are so glad to be able to support you while you're going through this time.</span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">It sounds like you're thoughts and emotions have gotten so intense, that you can't seem to find a way to relieve them.  Self-harm can seem like a good way to release the tension of these emotions, but it can also be dangerous.  There are many positive coping skills that can be very helpful, so I would like to provide you with a link where you can read about some coping skills that can help you get through these really difficult times.</span></p><p><a href="/Pages/tip-99-coping-skills.aspx"><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-99-coping-skills.aspx</span></a></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">Aside from these ideas, talking with people who are caring and supportive can help your negative feelings to feel lighter.  It sounds like you don't feel that you have positive emotional support around you, and that you don't feel comfortable talking to friends about these thoughts.  We strongly encourage you to reach out to us further to speak directly to a counselor.  There are several ways to do so:</span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3"><strong class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">CHAT or </strong><strong class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3" style="background-color:transparent;">TEXT</strong><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3" style="background-color:transparent;"> with a YLYV Counselor through </span><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3" style="background-color:transparent;"><a href="/" style="background-color:transparent;">www.yourlifeyourvoice.org</a>.</span></span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">There are also counselors available to speak to you by <strong>PHONE</strong> 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-448-3000.<span style="text-decoration:underline;"></span></span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">Thank you so much for taking this step for yourself.  You are not alone!  We hope you reach out for more support!</span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">Sincerely,</span></p><p><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3">Shannon, Counselor</span></p></div>16

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