My Friend Has Been CuttingAddictionMy Friend Has Been Cutting<div class="ExternalClassC65431F713444C828D368A119DD630C6"><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">I have a friend who began cutting himself due to complications with his girlfriend. How should I approach him without getting mad and what should I say to help him get through it? </span><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">​</span><br></p></div><div class="ExternalClass3859C59065FD47F2A8FB75270DC30319"><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">We are glad that you are writing in for help. Is your friend cutting to ease his emotional pain or is he making attempts to end his life? What we find is that many cut as a way to cope with what is going on in their lives. It is an unhealthy coping skill and the complications both emotional and physical can be serious. Self-injury can become very controlling. We are so glad that you are there for your friend and want to help your friend through this challenging time in their life.<br></span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">Bottom line is that your friend needs to learn other ways of coping with his feelings that are safer and healthier. On this website, Your Life Your Voice there is information about overcoming self-injury. We encourage you to read through this topic and share it with your friend. </span></p><p><a href="/Pages/self-injury.aspx"><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/self-injury.aspx</span></a><br style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;"></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">When you click on the link above, you will find many tips and tools. The tips and tools work together. Encourage your friend to read the tips and do the journaling tools located on the bottom of the page.<br></span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">As far as your initial approach to him goes, choose your time and place, be face to face with him and let him know that you understand how difficult his situation is and you want to help in any way you can. If you have seen the cuts or scratches then let him know that you have and you want to support him so he doesn't allow this behavior to control him. That is giving too much power and control away. Offer to help him get some help so he doesn't have to turn to this but instead can keep himself strong so as to better handle the tough things in life.</span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">Life is full of complications and how we handle them can make us stronger or lessen our emotional strength. We all can benefit in these times by having a strong network of support and you are part of his. Thank you for showing concern for your friend and for wanting to help.<br></span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">We suggest that you let his parents know that he needs help and that he is cutting to cope. They can help by giving him their support and then getting him in to see a therapist or counselor if they feel this is right for him. Even if he isn't happy that you shared this, he will realize that you truly are his friend and you do care about him.</span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">Sincerely, </span></p><p><span style="font-family:tahoma;font-size:17.3333px;">Pat, Counselor</span><br></p></div>17

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