Bulletin Board Post

Suicide

I Can't Take It

<div class="ExternalClass3E0563341B164A62ACC34DAFABEC6957">I can't take it. My chest hurts and I'm always crying. I'm using razors, knifes, my nails and choking myself to the point of throwing up to ease to pain. My family makes fun of me. I can't tell my friends what's happening because I'm the friend that is always smiling and give good advice. I don't know why everyone can't see through the mask I wear. I was really to kill myself a few months back using pain killers from the pharmacy but didn't because my mom noticed the bottle was gone and I had to quickly put it back. I also didn't do it because I HAD a sick grandmother who I knew loved me to pieces but now she has passed on. I just want to see her again. It hurts that I can't talk to anyone because I know with all my heart , they would change the way they look and me. I have a book that I write my thoughts in and every time I read what I write, it scares me to the point where I don't even know the person writing it. </div>

<div class="ExternalClassA3C3AD26657E4917894E92EC9B3DFF4A">It's great you are reaching out, because we do not want you to sit alone with these feelings. We know that it can be scary to open up to others, and sometimes the anticipation of their reactions is the scariest part of all. However, you have to open up. They cannot guess your feelings. If you are usually the good listener and the one others come to, you are probably the one they least expect to be feeling this way. It's time to enlist help. Your loved ones would be devastated that they had no idea you needed help, but you were no longer here.You've been such strength for them. It does not matter if their reaction is shock, worry, disbelief, sadness, or anger. Secrets keep people sick, but once a trusted adult knows you are thinking of ending your life, this person would want to get you help. Remember too, that family and friends cannot replace what a therapist could do, and a few people might say "I don't know what to say" or even start sharing some of their own feelings. That is why it is important to get some professional help as well as open up to family and friends.You will see your grandmother again in time, but for now, write a letter to her in your journal, say a prayer to her asking for strength, or even think of some memories when she got herself through a hard time or shared a story about a hardship she overcame. Your grandmother would want you to have a long and healthy life. There are other ways to ease emotional pain, that do not involve inflicting physical pain, harming yourself, or even hurting yourself more than you intend too. Here are a few articles that may be helpful, and we strongly encourage you to call in too as this is pretty serious. Again, thank you for reaching out. You are one step closer to getting some help. Do some reading from the links below and just choose one or two ideas to help you keep yourself safe today ok.<a href="/Pages/tip-20-Questions-to-Ask-Yourself-if-You-Feel-Like-Giving-Up.aspx">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-20-Questions-to-Ask-Yourself-if-You-Feel-Like-Giving-Up.aspx</a><a href="/Pages/tip-Suicidal-Thoughts.aspx">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-Suicidal-Thoughts.aspx</a><a href="/Pages/tip-not-feeling-support-from-parents.aspx">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-not-feeling-support-from-parents.aspx</a>Laura, Crisis Counselor</div>

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