Awkward and BoringFeelingsAwkward and Boring<div class="ExternalClass93BC8A5E9B164515A95A57036FAB3ED3"><p>​<span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4" style="">Hi my problem is that I am really awkward and boring. I can’t make conversations and even if I have something to talk about I make it very boring. Just this year, I made new friends in my school but as the time passed, I showed them my true nature. I couldn’t make conversations, I was quiet all the time, I was very boring, etc. They started to keep their distance from me, no one talked to me or I didn’t talk to nobody. Out of pity they would kinda at least say hi. I have some physical problems, when I walk so people laugh at me. I go to the physical therapy but nothings working on this. Because I am boring, look weird, am ugly, I don’t have the confidence to talk with a girl. I don’t even know what to do when I get a girlfriend. I don’t even have friends let alone a girlfriend. I have a language problem, I have been here for some years but I can’t speak the language very well , that’s probably because I don’t talk with people. It’s currently affecting my studies. I have constant anxiety while talking with people, when I have to talk in front of a group, my worst nightmare is when I have to do a group work. I NEED HELP PLZ, what should I do ?  </span><br></p></div><div class="ExternalClassCCAFE2C3931345CA8E42A4F7EECDA474"><p> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Thanks for emailing in today.  That is not a fun feeling to have when you feel like you are just existing with your classmates and not really connecting with anyone.  Having said that we are all usually the hardest on ourselves.  Right now you are feeling like you are awkward and boring and unattractive, but that not might be everyone else's perception.  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder .  It comes from within and without.  </span></p><p> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">True friends usually connect on other levels though.  You have to get to know each other , get along, respect each other, share common interests, build trust with each other and more.  That takes time, but it also takes work on your part too.  It can be challenging if you are anxious about conversing with others.  Focus on connecting with a few friends.  Some of the best romantic relationships start with a good friendship, and there is plenty of time to date.  Some people do not even start dating until their college or adult years and that is ok.  Here are a few things you can try on your end though:</span></p><ul><li> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Hold your head high<br></span></li><li> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Make eye contact with others<br></span></li><li> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Smile<br></span></li><li> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Be the first one to extend a greeting like "Hey how was your weekend" or "Hi there"<br></span></li><li> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Offer someone a genuine compliment<br></span></li></ul><p> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">You are right.  You have to practice talking with others to get more comfortable with it.  Even practice in the mirror at home.  It becomes easier the more you do it.  Also take a look at what clubs at school you might be interested in.  Maybe it is something to do with music, or art, or volunteer work, or keeping your school "green".  Write down about a half dozen things that interest you and find out what teacher is in charge of it.  When you join a smaller group like this, others in the group already share a common interest with you, so start by just talking about club, and what the plans are, or what you can contribute.  This will help you to become more comfortable in a group setting without having your grade being dependent on it as it is with group work.<br></span></p><p> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Here are some tips on anxiety too.  Before you walk out the door each morning, re-read them or remind yourself what you are going to do if you start to feel anxious ok.  Reach out any time if you need a listening ear or need to talk through something.</span></p><p> <a href="/Pages/tip-stop-morning-anxiety.aspx"><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-stop-morning-anxiety.aspx</span></a></p><p> <a href="/Pages/tip-6-steps-to-curm-social-anxiety.aspx"><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-6-steps-to-curm-social-anxiety.aspx</span></a></p><p> <a href="/Pages/tip-finding-yourself.aspx"><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-finding-yourself.aspx</span></a></p><p> <a href="/Pages/tip-improving-self-esteem.aspx"><span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/v2/Pages/tip-improving-self-esteem.aspx</span></a></p><p> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Laura, Crisis Counselor</span></p></div>17

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