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How Do I Cut Her Out Of My Life?RelationshipsHow Do I Cut Her Out Of My Life?<div class="ExternalClass9395E372B9B041F5A258F5E3D8E5CD3B"><p>​<span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4" style="">Hello. So there is a girl I made friends with sometime in freshman year but as time went on I started to notice she is bit mean. She will take stuff out my hands without asking such as my phone, she will always ask to copy my homework, also she is a bit homophobic, not to me, she doesn't know my sexuality but she has made some comments that makes me feel uncomfortable and makes me not want to be around her. So during the summer between freshman and sophomore year I didn't hang out with her or talk to her, I hoped that in sophomore year I wouldn't see her much and I could avoid her. I have school tomorrow and I hope I don't have classes with her. I honestly don't know to cut this person out my life and I don't want to deal with her for the rest of high school. </span><br></p></div><div class="ExternalClass867E29AE6DC447F4ABB322CF2EF2090B"><p>​</p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Thank you for reaching out for help when you are dealing with such a complicated friendship. Having someone in our lives who isn't the best influence on us or who doesn't treat us the best is never comfortable. You did a great thing by reaching out for help with such a complicated situation. Too often, we get into tough spots like this and we don't reach out for help for many reasons even though reaching out is one of the best things that we can do for ourselves and to get some perspective on what is going on.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">By the sounds of what you have described so far, it sounds like you have done some amazing things already to get some distance from this person. Cutting communication over the summer and putting some physical distance between you two are both great ways to start stepping away from someone. It is very common in high school though to still run into one another on occasion in classes, at lunch, or even before classes start in the morning. At the same time, since this is someone who is friends with your friend group, it is completely normal for you to run into her; your friends can and may choose to be friends with her even if you aren't anymore. Over all, these encounters aren't really in your control, but it is understandable that they still cause you some discomfort.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Off the top of our heads, there are two options that you can consider. Of course each option has its own pros and cons, so weigh your options before you make your decision. First, you can consider addressing the issue with this person directly. Telling them that you are not comfortable being their friend anymore if they continue this behavior and would like some distance. A benefit to this is being honest and getting the space you want, but the downside is the fact that you still have to finish out high school seeing this person; would confronting her make future interactions with her even more unbearable? With that in mind, the second option is leaving things as they are and continuing with what you are doing already. A benefit here is that things don't have as much of a potential to get worse, but there is the consequence of having to cope until you finish school.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">This is a lot to think about and give yourself some time to process everything; try not to make any decisions for a few days or even a few weeks until you get a better grip on the semester and better feel for how the school year will go. Along the way, if you need any help or support, don't hesitate to reach back out to us; we want to help in any way we can.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Good luck with everything and take care!</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">PC – Counselor</span></p></div>15

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