Our Parents Are FightingFamilyOur Parents Are Fighting<div class="ExternalClassB185E7735F0144B1BA5920F82119A260"><p>​<span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Well, I know about this site from a friend. He said that I can get help here. So I'm gonna try it. I never like to tell my problems to anyone except for my best friend. I'm just worried about my lil brother. He is 10. And I love him and always take care of him. We are not the perfect family. It started about a month ago. Our parents started fighting and yelling to each other and to us. Sometimes, I have heard something getting smashed. I don't know what really happened. But I'm just concerned about my brother. I don't want him to be worried. I always put him to sleep every night by reading stories so he will be happy. Also, I don't want him to hear the fight at night. So I try to make him sleep early. And I noticed that my father sleeps on the couch every night. So I talked to my friend about this and told him to keep it secret. I don't want anyone to know. And he told me about this site. And sometimes my bro asked me what's wrong with them? I didn't answer and I quickly changed the topic. I know I cannot do this any longer. Eventually he will know. And I always feel like they're gonna divorce someday. They didn't even want to share a bedroom for weeks. What can I do?</span><br></p></div><div class="ExternalClass318F10B70FA24042A2A8228030EF2C19"><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">I<span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">t's great that you are reaching out.  Your brother is very lucky to have you looking out for him.  No matter what either of your ages are, it is not fun to hear parents arguing.  Having said that, marriage can be wonderful, but it also is a lot of work.  Your brother is probably aware that there is a problem.  Even though he is only 10, he is likely hearing what you are hearing and is worried too.  He does not need to know details, but validating his feelings might be helpful for him and maybe even for you.</span></span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">A few things you could do is acknowledge that there is something that your parents are struggling with, but that it is something that the adults need to work out.  Your brother may relate to this more easily if you bring up a time when the two of you were fighting or when he and a friend might have been in a disagreement.  When you live under the same roof or grow up together, there is a lot of "together time" so it is bound to happen.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Ask yourself how you think one of your parents might respond if you shared your concern.   Another option would be to approach your dad or your mom to say that you are worried about your little brother, because he asked what was wrong.  As much as you would like to, you probably cannot promise that everything is ok to your brother, but you can tell him, you are there for him if he needs to talk or wants you to read to him or even lay down by him for a while. </span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">We know that you have a real fear that your parents may become divorced too.  Your brother may be having these same thoughts.  Although adult content should be kept out of the conversation, it is ok to let your brother know that you are worried too.  It is also ok if he asks you a question and you tell him you don't know the answer, because that is the honest truth – you just don't know.  Some feelings you are having could be anxiousness, sadness, or even confusion.  Help each other with these feelings, because there are things to do to help your mind remain calm: wo</span><span style="color:#333333;font-family:tahoma;font-size:13pt;background-color:transparent;">rk on homework together, go outside and throw a ball around, see if there are some neighbors whose pets you can both walk.  When you do things like this, it brings some normalcy to your lives especially when there are some things going on in your home right now that are not normally what you see.</span></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <font color="#333333" face="tahoma"><span style="font-size:17.33px;">We are here if you want to talk about this more.</span></font></p><p style="font-size:11.7px;"> <span class="ms-rteFontFace-1 ms-rteFontSize-3 ms-rteThemeForeColor-2-4">Laura, Crisis Counselor</span></p></div>14

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