When you lose somebody, you begin to grieve. For a lot of people this can be a difficult, confusing and even frustrating process. Everybody grieves differently. This can lead to questions about your own feelings and grieving process.
- Should I be sadder?
- Am I sad or just tired?
- Did I care?
- Am I grieving right?
- Am I even grieving at all?
Questions like this can make you feel guilty and even doubt how much you loved or cared about the person you lost. You might not even want to admit how you are really feeling to friends or family.
But here's the thing- your level of grief and way that you grieve is in no way an indicator of how much you loved or cared about the person you lost. Grief hits people at different times and in different ways.
Feeling kind of numb, or even just feeling okay after a loss doesn't relate to the quality of relationship you had in anyway. Sometimes you may feel very sad and depressed after losing someone you hardly knew; and then you might feel completely okay after losing someone you cared about very deeply.
That's okay. Just because you're unsure about the way you are grieving doesn't mean you didn't care about the person you lost. It's important to understand that everyone grieves differently...and that's okay.
Check out our other article on how Grief isn't One Size Fits All.