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Your Inner Voice

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Everyone has different voices in their head.

One voice is your inner friend. This voice may tell you that you did a great job on that math test, you look wonderful today, and that you are a fantastic friend. This voice is supportive and validates your worth.

The other voice is your inner critic. This voice might tell you that that you aren't as smart, attractive, or talented as others. It can lead you to believe that you are worthless, or don't deserve forgiveness or love. Unfortunately, this voice often overpowers any positive thoughts and tries to block out the voice of your inner friend.

Which voice do you hear more?

It can be easy to pay more attention to your inner critic, which in turn causes you to second guess yourself. When you notice this happening, take a few moments to tune into your inner friend. Remember that you are human, so you're allowed to make mistakes and to be less than perfect. Everyone has achieved a less than perfect score on a test, done something they're not proud of, or reacted in a way that was out of character.

Be kind to yourself and understand how big of an influence your inner critic has on how you feel and act. A helpful tool to quiet the inner critic is the STOP method; it helps you to recognize the emotions you're feeling and process them in healthy way.

How to use the STOP Method with your Inner Voice

S = Stop, take a moment and notice the thoughts that might be from your inner critic.

T = Take a deep breath, slow your thoughts down so you can hear your inner friend.

O = Observe the thoughts that you are having and choose to focus on the thoughts that build you up.

P = Proceed with purpose and kindness.

For more helpful tips visit the Taking Care of You topic.


You don't have to face your problems alone!

Counselors are standing by.

Ways to Get Help