It can be really hard to decide what to do if your friend is being abused. There's no easy black-and-white answer. Take the following into consideration:
How do you know your friend is being abused? Unless you see if happening, it will be impossible to know if your friend is being abused or not. If a friend tells you they are being abused, the most important thing to do is to believe them. It is not your responsibility to figure out whether the abuse is occurring or not.
Run it by an adult. If a friend tells you they are being abused, it is important to find an adult you and your friend can talk to. If this suggestion makes your friend nervous, validate that. Also tell them that you're so worried about them, that you don't think you can handle it without any additional help. Sometimes parents are good people to turn to, as are teachers and school counselors. You can also always contact us at the Boys Town National Hotline (800-448-3000).
Point them in the right direction. Although you may want to sweep in and stop someone from hurting your friend, this is probably not realistic or safe to do on your own. Therefore, try to get your friend to talk about the abuse with the right person. Point them towards trustworthy adults. If you are worried your friend may be hurt very soon, call our hotline with them, talk about what to do. We're available 24/7.
Be a good friend. Lots of adults can help abused kids, but none of them can replace a friend. If your friend has a lot of adults working with them and their family, the best thing you can do is keep your friend included, ask them how they're doing, redirect them to other sources of help when they need it, and keep things as normal as possible. Simply being a friend is the main role you play, and it's a really important one.
Child Protective Services. Another place you can turn for help in situations where you are worried abuse may be occurring is your state's child protective services hotline. These are hotlines you can call to make reports about abuse. Calling this hotline may result in people coming and checking on the safety of your friend and their family, but it is not guaranteed. It's just another step you can take if you are worried about a friend.
Again, if you're just not sure exactly what you should do, give us a call. We're always here if you need us!
