Sometimes when depression or anxiety lingers on for a long time, it may be more than just a passing mood or feeling. When this happens, talk about it, and get help.
Start the conversation:
- Talk to your parent/guardian directly. Be specific. Do your best to tell them why you feel like you need extra support. If you don't know why to feel a certain way, tell them that too. If you are uncomfortable about having this conversation in person, write a letter. Maybe you don't think that you can do this on your own. If that is the case, ask a trusted adult to help you have this conversation. If you don't know who to ask, we can help with this conversation – 800-448-3000.
- Don't assume that your family knows what you're thinking or feeling. They may sense that something is bothering you, but they may not understand that it is more than a passing feeling. If you have been telling them “nothing" is wrong, they may think that you need your space and assume you will talk to them when you are ready.
- Ask about your family history. Knowing if members of your family have struggled with their mental health and understanding what has helped them, can be beneficial when deciding what kind of help is right for you.
If you and your parent/guardian feel that additional help may be a good choice for you, work with them to follow these steps:
- Get a check-up. Doctors are experts at helping to sort out what is going on and if any of the feelings you are having could be related to your physical health. Often, doctors are well connected in the community and can make a recommendation for a counselor in your area.
- Find a counselor who can work with your schedule. You will want to find someone who can work around your school and/or work schedules, as well as your other activities.
- Look for someone with whom you can connect. When seeking professional help, you should feel safe. You will want someone you can trust. Some people may be more comfortable working with a man while others want to see a woman. Some people may want to work with somebody younger or while others want to work with somebody older. You may not be able to see exactly the type of counselor you want, but it doesn't hurt to ask.
- Keep track of your own appointment times. Write them down in your agenda or schedule them in your phone. Remind your parent/guardian if you need to. Take responsibility for being there and on time.
- Do the work. You will have to commit to wanting to get better. If the counselor gives you an assignment, or wants you to journal your thoughts and feelings, put forth the effort. If you are struggling with this work, that's okay too. Work with your counselor because only when you work together will you make progress.
Change, like opening yourself up to a counselor, can be difficult. Be patient with yourself and with your counselor. If several months have passed and the relationship does not seem like a good fit, you may need to re-evaluate. Counseling is like trying on shoes. You may try a few on to see how they feel, or you may need to give them time to get worn in until they are comfortable for you.
