There are times when the stress levels for your family seem to be high. What can you do to help ease some of the tension for yourself and your family during stressful times?
- Be mindful when making requests. If your parents are stressing about something like health, finances, or employment issues, you'll probably be able to tell. Be mindful that if they are feeling overextended, they may struggle with requests such as guests over, going out with friends, or making purchases. It can help to wait until things are calmed down to make these types of requests. If it is a request that needs to be made right away, stay calm, be clear, and be okay with hearing no.
- Keep your parents in the loop. If you are struggling with something, let your parents know. Even though they are facing their own stressors, they will most likely want to know what you are going through. Consider writing a letter to express your feelings. Often writing will help you to name your feelings and help you to sort through what kind of help you would like from them. A letter allows your parents to have time to give you a thoughtful response. If your parents are in an emotional state where they can't help, turn to other trusted adults in your life such as teachers, counselors, or coaches for assistance.
- Be conscious of your family budget. Many families may need to limit spending at times. Simplify, be realistic. Do your best to accept circumstances where plans or purchases may need to be delayed or changed to accommodate budgets.
- Be responsible with school. Do the best you can and stay on top of your schoolwork, this shows accountability and builds organizational skills. Sometimes if you demonstrate responsibility at school, your parents might offer more privileges and freedom at home.
- Help your parents out. Clean up after yourself. Take the time to pick up your room. Declutter. Offer to do some extra chores. One way we can feel better is by helping others, so doing something like cleaning the kitchen without being asked may not only delight your parents but give you a burst of joy too!
- Keep balance in your life. Have a routine. Exercise, eat right, practice healthy coping skills. Start a hobby or learn to do something new.
- Keep the peace. Do your best to show understanding and a spirit of cooperation with your family members. If there are conflicts, use your best communication skills and apologize when needed.
- Don't expect perfection. It's likely at some point you will get snippy or angry at your parents. If you do lash out, take some time to cool down, ask for forgiveness, and talk it out. They may also struggle to communicate with you at times. Do your best to be patient with yourself & with others.
When you start to feel angry, frustrated, or anxious remember that stress is a part of life. Going through a stressful time can be an opportunity for personal growth as you learn new skills and show responsibility. It can also be a time of growth for your family, as you work together to overcome the stress; you might become closer, learning to rely on each other more. Hopefully when it's over, you'll be able to look back and be proud of how well you and your family survived during a very challenging time.
