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TIP: Writing a Letter to Your Parents

​A conversation with a parent sometimes isn’t the best way to communicate because of how fast it all happens, how emotional it can get, or because you may not ever to be able to find a time where you both are open for a conversation.  Writing a letter can be helpful for many reasons including:

  1. It gives you time to organize your thoughts
  2. You may feel better simply writing the letter and getting it off your chest, even if you don’t deliver it.
  3. You can re-read the entire letter and rewrite it if you want.  In a conversation, once it is out, you can’t take it back.
  4. You can share your entire situation and feelings without interruption.
  5. You give your parents time to read, think, and respond thoughtfully.

 Here is a sample/outline of how a letter to a parent might work:

Dear Mom,

I know you probably are surprised to find this letter because I usually don’t do stuff like this, but I wanted you to know something and thought this may be a good way to talk with you… 

I have been really sad lately.  My classes are harder than ever and dad is probably going to freak out when he sees my report card this semester… 

I also have been getting made fun of at school a lot…

I need help.  I don’t know what kind of help I need or what needs to happen, but I feel like my whole world is falling around me.  I don’t want things to keep going on like this, but I don’t know what to do…

I know you won’t be able to fix all this stuff, but I wanted to let you know what was going on and see if you had any advice that you could give me.  One thing that I think would help… 

With a letter you can let the person know how you are feeling, give them information about what is going on, and then share with them what you think would help you.  You can put it in an email, a Facebook message, handwritten on a piece of paper, or printed out on the computer.  Do whatever works for you.

So, if you don’t want to talk to your parents, don’t!  Write a letter to them instead and see if it's a better way to share what's going on in your life.

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