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Your Relationships

TIP: Are You a Needy Friend?


​​Friends trust each other, feel for each other, and understand each other.  Friends make life better.  But what about those friendships that never really take off, or worse, don't last?  To have solid friendships, take a look at your behavior.  Make sure that you do the things needed to be a good friend to others.

Am I a needy friend??

  • Do you have a high turnover of friends?
  • Are you the one who always reaches out?  How often does this happen?
  • Do you only reach out when you need something?
  • What percentage of the time together is spent talking about you?
  • How often do you complain about things that are going on in your life?
  • Are you always asking others for favors to help you out in some way?

Having one of two of these characteristics doesn't necessarily make you needy, but it is a good idea to look at how you behave around your friends.

If I'm a needy friend, how do I change my ways?

  • Vary your topics when you're talking to your friends.  Don't always talk about your problems.
  • Listen to what your friends say in response.  Take advice.  Show them that their input counts and that you're not just whining about your problems to them.
  • Tell them, "Thank you," and let them know that you really appreciate the help they given.
  • Reciprocate.  Be willing to help.  They listened to you, now you  listen to them.
  • Show interest in your friends.  Ask them about their day.  Share their enthusiasm for things you both like.
  • Give compliments.  If you build your friends up, they will hopefully do the same for you.
  • Try journaling.  This saves you from unloading on your friends.
  • Build your self-esteem and self-confidence.  You have to be happy with yourself before anyone else will be truly happy with you.

You don't have to face your problems alone! Counselors are standing by.

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