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TIP: More than Friends?


​Sometimes after being friends for a while, feelings can turn into something a little more serious. Realizing you like someone as more than “just a friend” can be so exciting, but also really nerve wracking. You don’t want to make things awkward and ruin the friendship you have. Probably part of the reason you like them so much is because they are such a good friend. It may be hard to ignore these new feelings you are having. So, what do you do?

The first thing you need to ask yourself is whether it’s going to be worth talking to your friend about your feelings and the possibility of taking things to the next level. Looking at the potential risks and benefits can help you make this decision.

Some risks about being honest about your feelings could be:

  • Your friend may not feel the same way.
  • Things could get awkward, and your friend could distance them-self from you.
  • It could be embarrassing if other people find out.
  • If you get together and then break up, do you lose your friend forever?

On the other hand, it could also turn out to be something really great. Some potential benefits to opening up may be:

  • You may find out that your friend feels the same way.
  • It might be the start of a healthy romantic relationship.
  • The two of you could develop an even stronger friendship.
  • There may be a sense of relief by getting your feelings out.

If you decide to tell your friend how you’re feeling how you should let them know? It doesn’t have to be big or elaborate, keep it simple and keep it honest. You want to make it clear how you are feeling. It usually makes it easier to have the conversation privately between you and your friend. Take a deep breath, relax, and just tell them.

What if they aren’t interested? Will things be awkward? It’s hard to know how they may respond. You can only control how you react. Stay calm. Avoid a major emotional outburst. Don’t create un-necessary drama by being too needy or going on and on about your feelings. Your friend may need time to evaluate their feelings toward you. Give them the space that they need to do that. No matter how they respond, you will need to be prepared to accept whatever answer they give you.

What it all comes down to is that if you notice yourself developing deeper feelings for a friend, don’t panic! Take a step back and think about it, weigh the pros and the cons to make the best decision for yourself and for your friendship. If you make the decision to tell your friend, be confident and honest. No matter the outcome, be proud of yourself for taking the chance and opening up about how you feel.​

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