IMPROVING YOUR SELF ESTEEM
Comparing ourselves to our peers is a way to gauge how “normal” we are, and maybe get some ideas about our own strengths and weaknesses. The problem comes in when this process snowballs and gets out of our control. We start to think that we will never be good enough. Maybe you’ll recognize some of these statements:
- “I’m not smart enough”
- “My skin color isn’t right”
- “I’m not important enough”
- “I’m not thin, pretty, handsome, athletic, funny, happy…”
- “I’M NOT ENOUGH!”
Once you make the decision to take control of your self-esteem, the first place to start is with time. Sounds like a weird suggestion, but think about it for a second. People with negative self-esteem tend to be thinking about two things:
· the past
· the future
They’re sad because they think their past was a failure and they are scared that they are never going to be what they want to be in the future. Thinking like this does one thing, it never lets you live your life. If your mind is stuck in either place, you never get to really experience what is good in your life right now.
So once you’re “in the present,” here are some points to remember and some ways to build your self esteem:
- You are responsible for how you see yourself.
- Recognize that comparing yourself to others makes you feel less human.
- Fill your life with things that work and things you are good at.
- Surround yourself with people who appreciate what you are right now.
- Focus on what you can control and recognize what you cannot control.
- Refuse to see yourself just as an image.
Most importantly, understand that having a great self-esteem says nothing about how good of a person you are. There are plenty of dangerous and hateful people who think the world of themselves. So every time you start to question yourself, remember that every day is another opportunity to be a good person and good people are a gift to the world.