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Edited: 9/13/2011 10:53 AM by
Twin Brother Torments Me

I was born with a twin brother. My brother has been tormenting me emotionally and physically. I was born with "alopecia areata" which causes me to lose all my hair in my head. Because of that I have been bullied and emotionally damaged ever since first grade. My brother would never support me and he and his friends would make fun of me.

At home, if he doesn't get what he wants, he would throw a tantrum and scream and hit until he got what he wants. After he emotionally tormented me, he would tell me to go "kill myself" after I was crying. I know I can't fight back because I am too physically weak and sometimes I wish I wasn't. He would also turn up is stupid loud music in his room when I am studying.

My parents are to scared of him to do anything about it because they know they are too physically weak. In middle school, I was on the brink of depression. I began to cut myself and think of suicide. Those days are over, but now I start to see it come back again. I wish my twin brother didn't exist. My life would be so peaceful if he wasn't in my life

Edited: 9/13/2011 10:53 AM by

Sorry to hear about your struggles at home and with your brother. The way that he has been treating you over the years is completely unjustifiable and you certainly don’t deserve it. No one deserves to live in an environment where they are physically and emotionally tormented.

We’re sorry that your parents haven’t intervened to keep you safe. Have you ever reached out to another trusted adult? Perhaps your doctor, an aunt or uncle, school teacher, or counselor. It’s important that you reach out to help so that others can intervene and help improve the situation and ensure your safety.

It’s understandable that you’d feel like your brother would just disappear. That would probably make things much easier, wouldn’t it? Unfortunately, as you know, this isn’t going to happen. Since you stated you’re 15 years old, you two probably have at least another 3 years together at home. While you can’t control your brother’s actions or how he treats you, you can control how you react to him.

Consider creating a safety plan for yourself. A safety plan would be utilized any time your brother becomes abusive or is harassing you. You could go to your room, lock yourself in the bathroom, call a relative, or go to a friend’s house. Brainstorm different activities that you can do to remove yourself from the situation with your brother.

It’s also important that you take time to yourself to enjoy pleasurable activities. The stress of your alopecia paired with your stressful home life has to be really wearing on you. Make sure that you’re taking time to yourself each and everyday to enjoy an activity that you enjoy. Whether it’s journaling, painting, listening to your favorite CD, or anything else that brings you a moment of happiness. It’s so vital to our overall health and wellbeing that we take time to enjoy life. Although your situation is a tough one, there are still things in life to enjoy!

We’re happy to hear that your thoughts of suicide are a thing of the past. But we certainly don’t want those to return! Have you ever considered seeing a counselor to have ongoing support and guidance? Perhaps this would give you an outlet so that you do not have to resort back to your negative coping skills by cutting. If you need help locating a therapist in your area, let us know and we can offer your referrals in your area.

Let us know how you’re doing and if there’s anything else we can do to offer you support.

Take care of yourself and we wish you the very best!

Jessie, Crisis Counselor