We're really glad that you decided to reach out to us tonight! Moving to a new state is difficult enough, but when you are fighting with your parents and being bullied it can feel that much more difficult. We are so sorry to hear about your friend ending his own life, we can't imagine how difficult that must be for you right now. With everything else that is going on, this must just feel like the straw that broke that camel's back.
You are overwhelmed right now, and that is totally normal considering what you are going through. Anybody would feel like they have the weight of the world on them after going through all of that. You really need to give yourself credit, because after going through all of that you are still here and still had the strength and courage to send us an email. You might feel damaged right now, but having that strength really shows us that you aren't broken...even if it feels like it.
Your friend ending his life was his choice and his alone. You spoke with him and probably offered him friendship and support for how he was feeling. Not everybody who feels upset takes their own life. You did what you could do to help him get through what he was feeling. Taking his own life was tragic and we know that you are hurting so much right now.
People would hurt just as much if you were to take your life, please don't. You can get through this, you really can. Your friend decided to use a permanent solution for what were quite possibly temporary problems; and the solution was definitely not a good one. If you choose to end your life you are cutting yourself off from all of the love, enthusiasm, laughter, friendship, and accomplishment that life gives to us. All of these things can be yours. Do you feel like you are gonna be able to keep yourself safe?
Can you make a promise to yourself that you will reach out to your parents or some other adult you trust if you feel like you are going to harm yourself? You are important and people care about you. Things feel bleak and overwhelming, but that will change. We just want you to be alive and well when the day comes that things start to turn up for you...because that day WILL come.
Bullying is such a crappy experience to go through. The kids who are doing this to you are really showing how immature they are. We know that doesn't make the bullying feel any better or go away, but it really is the truth. You are showing what a mature, level-headed girl you are by not taking part in bullying yourself. Whenever somebody is being bullied, the best thing you can do is avoid reacting yourself. Talk to a teacher at school or the principal, let him or her know what's going on. You deserve their help. Let them know when and where the bullying usually happens, that way they can keep an eye on things.
That's really awesome that you've been able to make a couple friends since you moved to the new school. Having other people there who you can call friends and spend some time with is a really great way to remember how appreciated you are. Moving to a new school is tough, making friends takes some time. By making a couple of friends you really are showing yourself that you have what it takes to make more. You can always grow your social circle. In the mean time, focus on yourself, your interests, and school....friendships take time to go grow, but that definitely doesn't mean that it isn't possible to make new friends.
Keep in touch. Please let us know how things are going and if you can stay safe. Remember, we are always just a phone call or an email away when you need somebody to talk to. You never have to go through this alone, k?