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Edited: 7/13/2012 9:15 AM by
Social Outcast

I hate my school. I ask my parents if I can be home schooled and they think it's a joke. I want to move schools, and I asked them for that and they think it's a joke but no one listens to me. The kids at my school are so obnoxious and I just don't fit in. I feel so distant from everyone there. I have no friends at school. I know that kids at me school don't like me and my best friend dumped me all of a sudden for someone she used to tell me she hates.

I just don't understand what I did wrong. Why does she not like me all of a sudden? I'm pretty sure I deserve an answer, but it's been like 6 months since she "dumped" me and I don't know how to ask her for an explanation. Now I have no friends at school.  I am like a social outcast... awkward. I just feel so alone when I'm there. I am on a synchronized skating team so I have my closest friends on the team. They have helped me through the hardest year of my life, but now I feel distant from them.

I love them all so much they are my best friends now, and I love to hang out with them and be with them and everything, but they all live far away and we hardly get to see each other except for at practice so it's hard. I hate where I live. I just don't fit in here. At all in any way. My parents don't understand that. I am fat as well. Everyone where I live is like 5'6 and 90 pounds. I am 5'4 and 138 pounds. I know the reason I don't have friends is because I'm fat and the reason I've never kissed a boy or had a boyfriend is because I'm fat.

I've starved myself for a while and my mom doesn't know. Now I am on Jenny Craig and hopefully losing weight, but I still don't feel good enough for anyone or perfect enough for anyone. I just feel distant and I have moments of happiness, and love but most of the time I just don't know how I feel. Lost and lonely and numb. Please give me some answers because I am lost. ​

Edited: 7/13/2012 9:15 AM by
We are so sorry to hear that you are struggling so much.  We are glad you have reached out today.  Loneliness is a tough thing and high school can be extremely difficult.  We hope that you can get out of the realm of your high school in some way, shape or form.  One thing that will help you a lot is if you can find a place where you feel accepted and like you belong.  It's too bad you are feeling distant from your synchronized skating friends.  Is there anything you could do to reconnect with them?
 
It's time to get out there and see what alternative support systems you can find for yourself.  Whether it is a church group, a part time job (maybe could you work at a skating rink?), volunteering somewhere like an animal shelter or joining a club sports team, these are all ways to search out places where you can feel like you belong and get the support that you are seeking.  it's not necessarily going to happen right away or be easy, but we think it is an effort worth putting out!
 
We can tell that you don't think too highly of yourself.  Your low self esteem is certainly something that we also hope you can begin to work on.  When you feel like a social outcast, you tend to act like a social outcast.  If you label yourself as something, you then tend to take on that label.  Don't fall into that trap.  Do things for yourself that make you feel good about yourself.  This could be writing, reading, spending time with pets or serving others in some way.  I had a depressed friend who began volunteering at a rescue that helped stray animals and it changed her life.  We hope you can find a way to do things that help you compliment yourself rather than just criticize yourself for the problems you are currently facing.  You can start by writing down your strengths or positive things about yourself and then reading it everyday.  This can help shift your perspective to something more positive.
 
Please take care and keep us updated on how things progress!  You are not alone, we are here to help!
 
Counselor, Dominic

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