We are sorry that you put yourself out there and then got hurt like this. You did nothing wrong and we think you handled this situation exactly right. We are sorry it didn't work out the way that you had wanted. He probably didn't call you because he didn't want to upset you and he probably didn't know how to say it. Whenever somebody has the courage and strength to tell somebody how they feel, it puts them in a vulnerable position.

That's part of the whole relationship picture, if you don't make yourself vulnerable, than you will never be able to be with somebody because that vulnerability is part of the relationship. We hope that you can use some good coping skills to get through this emotionally difficult time. We also hope that this does not stop you from putting yourself out there in the future. The one sure fire way to never be in a relationship with anybody is to never let yourself get close to anyone. We hope you can maintain you strength and courage.

Time heals all wounds and right now we want you to do things that will make time go as fast as possible. When we have nothing to do, that is when we sit around and feel bad about ourselves. Try to spend time with friends, family, projects, hobbies, and active lifestyle choices! This will make time go faster, allow you to accomplish goals, and get support from people who you care about, which are all crucial in getting through the tough times.

As far as your relationship with this young man, it may be that you have to distance yourself from him for awhile because the more time you are around him, the more you will hurt. Friendships fail to function in a healthy way if one friend has more than friendly feelings for the other. This doesn't mean you can never be friends again, just let him know you need some time away from him because of how things are working out. Let him know that you consider him more than a friend and that you need time to reestablish a true friendship with him. If he is a true friend, he will understand.

So keep busy with things like exercising, joining clubs and sports teams, doing art, writing poetry, journaling, learning to play an instrument, or volunteering at an animal shelter. All of these are great ways to make time go fast and be around others who can be there for you.

Please take care!

Counselor, Dominic