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Edited: 5/27/2010 10:07 AM
Worrying About How Others Act
I've had a lot of big things happen in the last couple years, a close friend died, my sister's friend died, and I have made some big decisions regarding schooling and my career. From all these things I have learned to appreciate life and live like there's no tomorrow. I like to be a positive person, and try to only keep positive people in my life. However, lately I have been getting very frustrated by rude/ignorant people that I encounter on a regular basis (people that I serve at work, friends of friends, or just total strangers). I don't like to judge people, and try to give people the benefit of the doubt most of the time, but lately I have been getting very upset from noticing people not appreciating what they have or complaining about things that are not important. I also get angry seeing/talking to people that seam to have everything they want, when I know that they don't work hard for it (I live in a little town, so I know almost everyone and what they do for a living). I know that I shouldn't let things like this bother me because it's not my life, I can't change it, and I may not know the whole story, but it still does. I feel like people's negative energy, makes me angry at that person for being negative, which is something I do not want to make a lifelong habit of. I have already tried being super positive towards the person, and that seams to not help because when they don't respond well, or say some catty/idiotic thing like, "well today couldn't get any worse", and that makes me even more upset.  Any Ideas on how I can not be so affected be other people's ideas/feeling about their life.
Edited: 5/27/2010 10:13 AM
Thanks for your email.  Sounds like you are wise beyond your years. When someone close to us dies, it changes our lives- some people become bitter and angry and others grow from the experience and learn to appreciate their lives more than ever. Thankfully, you are one of the positive thinkers who have grown and appreciate each day you've been given!

As you stated, we don't have any control over other people's comments/ responses towards anything we say to them. Have you ever heard the comment that some people see the cup half empty  (negative thinkers) and the positive people see the cup half full? I'm going to encourage you to keep your positive attitude towards life, no matter what is taking place around you.
When you pick up on the negativity of someone, try and spend minimal time around them. This may be the time to look for new friends and hobbies or take up a sport to decrease any anxiety created by the negativity of others. Find ways to destress when you become upset by other people's behavior. Some people find exercise is very helpful and others like to journal or listen to music. Whatever works for you!

Take care of yourself and stay in touch with us.

Sincerely,
Sharon, Hotline Crisis Counselor