We are sorry that you are feeling so down. It sounds like, even though things have improved in some ways, you are still going through a bit of a depression. We are glad you have reached out to talk about how you are feeling today. It can make a big difference in how you are feeling. It's great that you found us!
We are sorry that your mother still occasionally stresses you out, although it does sound like things are way better than they were before. It is hard when parents are always yelling and judging us. It may sound weird, but the reason that they do that sometimes is because they care about us. Our parents want us to be successful and happy, so when they see their children doing something like acting out in a way that they feel is not good for them, than they may lash out.
This may not be the appropriate way for a parent to respond and it may not even be helpful, but they may be doing it because they care. It is also probably likely that you may be catching the brunt of their stress which may not even have any problem with you, they may just take it out on you, which is not fun.
Some of your behaviors have us really concerned for you. Cutting and burning are both dangerous forms of self harm that can have some pretty serious medical complications including infection. We understand that cutting can provide some emotional relief, otherwise people wouldn't do it, but we hope that you can find some other things that you could do instead of cutting to get relief.
Whether it is exercise, yoga, meditation, writing, drawing, listening to music, spending time with a dance, calling a friend, journaling, or even just writing us or call our hotline, these are all better than cutting. Cutting is addictive, which means it is tough to stop once you have started and often with addiction, you symptoms of the addiction will grow more severe over time.
We don't want your cutting to escalate, that could make for a very dangerous situation. Cutting can also effect your relationships with your friends and families because you have to hide it. Whenever you have things that you have to hide, it can create a barrier between you and other people. We don't want you to be isolated from others, that is a lonely place to be.
We also are concerned about your eating habits. Healthy eating patterns are very important to physical and mental health. Please check out the following website,